Divorcing New York couples may wonder what joint custody will look like for their particular situation. After the stress of divorce, the last thing parents need is conflict over child custody. The following tips can help you devise a custody plan that works for your family’s unique situation.
Remember that child custody is about the children
Developing a child custody parenting plan should be all about your children, but it is easy to let your ego get in the way. What is best for the child means that time spent with parents will not always be equal, nor will you always get your first preferences. Working amicably with the other parent is the best way to provide a peaceful joint custody arrangement for your children.
Customize your parenting schedule
Parents who work abnormal hours or have other commitments can come together to create a scheduling plan that works for them. There is no set schedule that every family must use. Make your schedule to suit your family’s needs.
Do not speak badly of one another
Speaking badly of the other parent in front of your child hurts your child more than anyone else. Keep in mind that your child is part of the other parent, so they can internalize the bad things you say. Your child still loves his or her other parent whether you do or not.
Listen to your child’s thoughts and feelings
Listening to and acknowledging your child’s feelings about the divorce or custody arrangement can help them to cope with the changes. Letting them be heard helps them to feel as if they have some control in the divorce and custody process. However, you are still the one responsible for making the best decisions for them. If you encounter conflict in this or another area, a family law attorney may offer assistance.